Subconscious Judge
Juno W.
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Going into this painting, I had a goal to portray how judgement is rooted through fear. I ended up using portraits to convey this idea because I feel the face is one of the most expressive parts of the human body, and most of my art uses the human body in some way.
This happens to be the first time I’ve used oil paint, so learning how the opacity and translucence can affect the dimensions of a subject was especially difficult. I feel that may be another reason I chose to use faces, because a face is something I am extremely familiar with creating. I watched countless tutorials on YouTube and such, and decided this piece should use many contrasting colors to continue to convey that feeling of unknowing and uncertainty. I filled the left canvas with a lighter green tone and the right canvas with a darker green tone. I then sketched out both faces, the left one looking up with wide dreaming eyes filled with aspiration, and the other one sort of shying away giving the left one a judging side eye. I used a flat brush and avoided blending as much as I could to go for a textured and human feel. I filled in the darker tones for both paintings with a cool blue tone, and continued layering in warmer colors until they both looked like faces. I went back in with cool tones for the more deep parts of the face like the crevices of the nose, the jawline, and corners of the eyes. I used a light yellow to highlight the parts of the face that stick out like the tip of the lips, nose, forehead, and browbone. After the oil paint dried for about a day, I used oil pastels to create more texture around the eyes, highlights of the face, and hair. I also used pastels to add texture and feeling into the background, which were straight strokes of different shades of green. For the right piece, I put strokes of green through the face because I wanted it to portray a subconscious aura, something that is stuck in a way in someone’s thoughts. Throughout painting this piece, I painted both canvases at the same time because I know as I learn, my style and technique change throughout the piece. I wanted the two canvases to share as much of the same style as possible Since they are both the same work of art.
A majority of dreams aren’t haltered by external factors, but a persons uncertainty of what is to happen if they step across this imaginary line of what is acceptable and whatever might be on the other side. I wanted to portray that inner judgement and fear I feel when I have aspirations for myself whether it be wanting to be recruited for college athletics or something as small as making a phone call, all because that inner fear makes be only think about negative outcomes. My main objective isn’t to use art to solve a problem or tell people to fix something, but to use make a person aware of something they might be feeling, because that is the way I feel as well. Whatever they decide to do with that awareness is their own separate problem. I hope by portraying a message that I’m feeling in my own conscious I can help bring a person comfort they may feel from relating to my work.
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Using art as a medium to express my ideologies and perspective on life allows me to express life in my mind in a way that can be seen by all eyes. This provides an impact on my life in a way where I can portray my thoughts without having to say a word.
