Bovine Sacrilegious Encephalopathy
Sofia G.M.
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The pieces within Sacrilegious Mad Cow Fever Dream were written over nearly six months. Breaking my writing into segments allowed me to connect various thoughts, all converging on one theme: the fetishization of women of color. Drawing from my experiences as a black woman who dates outside my race, many sections reflect thoughts that occupy my mind daily. Expressing my romanticism often leads me to be perceived as a porn category by men. My collection links the impact of porn on the brain to mad cow disease, highlighting how black women are treated like meat. The first piece in this collection, Ebony Tumor, emerged from my anger at my ex-boyfriend. His words during our relationship linger as a reminder that, before anything else, I am seen as black. Through writing this piece, I confronted and reconciled with my anger. Industry Standard serves as a midpoint, commentary on the porn industry and how it treats black women. References to prostitution and pornographic material aim to address how it’s inherently racist. While I've never had firsthand experiences with either, Barely Legal/Suckling Pig draws inspiration from my experience of sexual assault, where I realized my race was commodified. When getting feedback on this piece, I was often met with criticism of how bleak and shocking it was. However, I thought the over-the-topness conveyed my feelings perfectly, my anger, sadness, shock, and everything in between manifesting in extremely graphic imagery.
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From the moment I wake up in the morning to when I go to bed, I’m constantly getting inspired by everything. I see something that could potentially be a piece of writing, a song, an instillation. Creativity has become my weapon, defending myself from my trauma consuming me.